Lock Stock

My wife’s not happy. The thing is, we’ve had so many iPhones in, myself and the guys have been staying back late to clear the backlog – sometimes a bit too late, midnight or even later.

It would be better if she just shouted at me, but she’s not said a word; when you get the silent treatment, you know you’re in real trouble.

Of course, my late arrival has been because of the sheer volume of iPhones we’ve had in, either for unlocking, jail-breaking, de-bricking – you name it, we’ve had it. The thing is, try explaining that to the missus.

So, I need to get back in her good books. I’m trying to get tickets for us to go out and see the Dirty Dancing musical. I reckon it’ll be a good night out, and knowing the film, it’ll be the kind of thing she’ll love.

Of course, you know the story. Baby goes to a holiday camp with mum and dad, falls in love with the misunderstood Johnny, but protective dad doesn’t like our heroes’ moves; despite being a good guy, Johnny’s got a bad rep, and Baby’s dad thinks Johnny’s bad news. In time he realises how wrong he is, and understands Baby and Johnny belong together.

Great story, but ironic when you think about it. For Baby, read iPhone. For Baby’s dad, well hello Mr Steve Jobs. And for the misunderstood Johnny, step forward us in the unlocking community. We truly love the iPhone, and want it to be free, not a slave to four networks (AT&T USA, T-Mobile Deutschland, Orange France and O2 UK). See right now, Mr Jobs, (Baby’s dad) doesn’t think we’re good enough for the iPhone. But soon enough he’ll realise the best iPhone is an unlocked iPhone, free for everyone to love.

It’s just the Jobs

But, as always, not everyone appreciates true love; they put obstacles in its way. For example, there are people who don’t realise you can just go to an O2 or Carphone Warehouse store and buy the iPhone (for £269) without having to have a credit check. It’s that simple. No poor value contract, even after O2’s restructuring.

Think about it: £269 for the handset, then £65 to have it unlocked. For £334, you’ve got the iPhone of your dreams.

How much was it for that SIM-Free Nokia 8800?!

Then there’s the problems of getting hold of parts, especially the LCDs. The fact its Chinese New Year doesn’t help, as it means customers are left facing greater expense and delay by having to go to through Apple’s official repair service. Don’t worry though, they’ll be back in soon, and we’ll be back fixing them within 48-hours.

You see Mr Jobs, we’re not as bad as you think, and we want your customers to love your baby. So the next time you’re in London, pop down to London Bridge. I’ll take you out for an ice cream and a packet of Jaffa Cakes and you’ll realise your iPhone’s in good hands with us.